Put anyone on this picture in the position to actually have a shot at winning a race and all that "doing my best to grow" crap is going out the window. We say things like that because we don't have choice - or chance. We say it to stay motivated and look for bigger reasons. Competitions are created to satiate our instincts to beat someone (if you ever won a race, you know that it feels fucking awesome).
I'm running the NYC Half this Sunday. Based on my current fitness, I'll have to be happy with breaking 1:20 which would put me exactly at my desired marathon pace for this year in November at the NYC Marathon. Frightening.
But that's when everything goes right because even sub 1:20 seems a bit of a stretch right now. I haven't been running much and only a couple of runs were uptempo. One excuse is the cold weather. The other is work but that doesn't really count. The result is not mainly lack of fitness but rather excess of weight that crept back on once I left the tropics. This frigid BS called winter makes my body ramp up fat reserves faster than I can eat. At least that's what I'm telling myself.
I'll give it everything I got.
I'm just not sure yet if that is quite something at all.